I’m a Mom. I’ve been puked on, peed on, and I’m the designated booty-wiper. I’ve delivered 3 children – two of them naturally. I use a Diva Cup for heaven’s sake! (Uh. Gentlemen, if you don’t know what that is, you may want to skip learning. Don’t say you weren’t warned. I’m just sayin’!)
Outside of the USUAL reason to keep lubricating jelly/gel on hand, it’s a good thing to use to “help” your child to make the RIGHT choice. Specifically, you say this phrase:
“Son, this is your last chance. If you don’t let me take your temperature in your ear, we’re going to have to do it the OTHER way.”
as you’re reaching for the tube and the thermometer. I PROMISE you he’ll sit so incredibly still as you’re using the “earmometer”.
So Em, what the almighty hell does this have to do with you being squicked?
As I was waiting for my prescription to be filled at The Evil Empire, I happened to notice the Brand X lube on the shelf. The thought occurred that I should probably pick some up – and so I did. Tossed the box in my buggy without another thought. Brought it home and stuck it in the cabinet without another thought.
As time went on, I happened to be without *ahem* reading material one day. I picked the box up, turned it around, and started reading.
My jaw dropped.
Did you see what made my jaw drop? Huh, huh didja didja didja?
Eew eew eew EEW EEW! The box shall forever remain unopened. I’ll probably take it back to the store and try to get my money back.
Learn from my mistakes, people! Read the box WHILE you’re in the store! NOTICE these things!
oh em gee! ewwwwwwwwww, ewwwwwwwwww, and yucky icky ewwwwwww.