LunaNi?a.com | Unconscious Mutterings: Week 67
- Playoffs::sports
- Morris:: Minor
- Break up:: reconcile
- Eggs:: scrambled
- Parker:: Brothers
- Hardy Boys:: Mysteries
- Deluxe:: version
- Protection:: condom
- Girl Scout:: cookies
- Salsa:: caliente
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Does my subconscious say things to you?
Light Blogging weekend!
Joe is teething, and is grossly unhappy unless sitting right. on. my. lap. so not a lot of anything else is getting done.
Hopefully we’ll be back to nermal by Monday.
heh
You’re a Spirograph!! You’re pretty tripped out,
even though you’ve been known to be a bit
boring at times. You manage to serve your
purpose in life while expending hardly any
effort (and are probably stoned to the gills
all the while).
What childhood toy from the 80s are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
I’m Blue, da ba dee
What Color is Your Brain?
brought to you by Quizilla
At work or in school: I like to be with people, sharing with them, inspiring them, and helping them. I work and learn best when I can take into consideration people and the human element. I flourish in an atmosphere of cooperation.
With friends: I always look for perfect love. I am very romantic, and I enjoy doing thoughtful things for others. I am affectionate, supportive and a good listener.
With family: I like to be happy and loving. I am very sensitive to rejection from my family and to family conflicts. I really like to be well thought of and need frequent reassurance. I love intimate talks and warm feelings
Great moments in Toddler History:
I walk into the livingroom and notice Dan is missing. “Alannah, where is your brother?” I walk into the kitchen and look around the corner and stifle a giggle. My darling son pushed a chair to the fridge, stood up on the chair, opened the freezer, picked up an ENTIRE pack of popsicles (there are like 12 in a pack), ducked down in the chair, closed the door (and made SURE it was closed), then hopped out of the chair and skipped across the kitchen yelling “I GOT POPSICLES!!! I GOT POPSICLES!!!!”
It’s snack time and he doesn’t want *anything* snacky in the house. I finally grab a spoon, dig a big glob of peanut butter out and hand it to him. He says “I don’t WANT peanut butter”, but takes the spoon anyway. I finish loading the dishwasher and walk into the living room. He’s sitting in the recliner with the footrest extended (even tho his legs barely reach the end of the cushion), fondling himself, and licking the spoon.
My Dad has an outside (stray) cat that he feeds occasionally. We have a new puppy. On the day that these two animals decided to rub noses, Dad and Dan were outside “working” on the truck. The cat saw the pup and hissed, and da pup decided to go try to sniff the cat’s butt. Can you imagine what happened next? (besides the obvious arched back and hissing noises) Dan went streaking across the yard, yelling “I’ll save you, puppy!”
good times 
You must choose?
- Would you rather:
- one day at a job you like, have your boss catch you masturbating OR sending out resumes to other employers?
it could lead to more $$$.
- be seen on a date with a beautiful woman that was actaully a man OR be seen on a date with a really ugly skank that smelled bad (courtesy of genuine)
- be on a totally nude beach all day long (with no chance of escape) without any kind of sunscreen or shade OR use the nastiest construction-site port-o-potty (out of severe need) that is lacking toilet paper? (courtesy of shaunacat)
- be the first one to know the world is ending OR be the last one to know the world is ending? (courtesy of ilgondo)
I’ll take a well-maintained cross-dresser any day.
I can always go home and shower. Short term disgust will win every time.
I’d obsess about it. Better to find out right before it happens.
7:15 AM
And Joe and I have been up for an hour. I’m not quite sure HOW I feel about it…since I’m still numb.
BITCH NOTE!
All I’ll say about my Mother’s Day is: I spent it with a migraine. On the up-side, it was relatively short-lived – only 8 hours, as opposed to 3 days. On the downside, I think ACTUALLY horking up my toenails would have been less painful.
I picked Dan up and heard something in my lower back go *pop*. Hopefully, it will resolve itself and I won’t need to spend 2 hours trying to persuade a stupid PCP that I don’t need ibuprofen 20,000 mg tablets, I need a chiropractor.
Alannah is getting more moody as the days go by. And she keeps pushing to go to public school. Why? So she can have lunch and recess. No other reason. Yes, she understands that she’s 3-4 years ahead of her age group in some subjects. Apparently that doesn’t matter. OH! and she’s also trying to yank our cousin to the dark side *laughs*. They decided the best thing to do would be to gang up on the Moms and have me homeschool BOTH of them. Nevermind that they drive each other crazy.
Tomorrow’s GOT to get bettah.
Unconscious Mutterings Week 66
LunaNi?a.com | Unconscious Mutterings
- Vagina::birth
- Racism::ignorance
- Mother’s Day:: card
- Fire alarm:: run
- Elvis:: pelvis
- Pregnant:: bliss
- Vacation:: getaway
- Waffles:: syrup
- Perpendicular::car
- Hospital:: sickness
YES! StealthMom Strikes Again!
Moms, do you have a preteen daughter driving you crazy? Are her hormonal swings making you grind your teeth in frustration? Then do *I* have the solution for you! It’s the MEGA BLASTER ATTITUDE ADJUSTER!
Tools needed:
Mega Blaster water cannon
refrigerated water (preferably ice cold)
Pour ice-cold water into the holding tank of the cannon. Sneak up on your preteen, and OPEN FIRE! Watch her run screaming through the yard, and CHASE HER! Empty tank? No problem – just refill it from the garden hose. No wait. Take the GARDEN HOSE and chase her. When she gets out of range of the hose, THEN reload and go running again.
Yes, I’m evil. Gotta problem with it?